Thursday, November 12, 2009

Is She a Gold Digger or Just Old Fashioned?

A Response to the "Check Dance" from Guest Blogger, Kevin Blanchard

As a modern/progressive single guy, I was happy to see your encouragement that the girl offer to pay tip or for the next date in your "Do's and Don'ts" suggestions. While I do realize even the most independent and modern girl usually expects at least a first date covered by the guy even in this day and age, as a guy I hate to feel like a piggy bank. Not that I mind spending the money, but usually if a girl hasn't offered to pay for something (even if its just ice cream after dinner) by the 3rd date, it sets off the gold digger alarm. I grew up in the Northeast, so that may have something to do with it. I know girls down in the south tend to be a bit more old fashioned, but if they are a gold digger or so old fashioned they don't feel they ever have to pay for a date, then it's probably not the girl for me anyway. When I look for a girl to share my life with and be in a relationship with, I'm looking for a partner and an equal.

I used to say relationships are 50/50, but more recently I have realized that relationships are 100/100. The cooking, cleaning, emotional, financial. It all needs to get done. It's not "my" job to provide those things, it's not "her" job to provide those things, it's "our" job. It's team work.

When I am getting serious with a girl, these are the traits I look for. I don't expect anything from her that I wouldn't do for myself and visa versa. These feelings I have just conveyed also apply for matters of the heart too. Of course, balance is the key. A little give and take depending on where each person is in their life.

- Edited by Lauren K. of the Love Kudos Duo -
Seeking online dating success stories. Please e-mail them to lovekudos@gmail.com. Please indicate if you would like your story posted anonymously or with your identity revealed. It can be a story of a friend or family member.

1 comment:

AChesler said...

You know what would be even better ladies? If you like the guy and want to see him again... pay for dinner and tell the guy he can get the next date. Then its obvious you aren't being a gold digger and are definitely interested in him.

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