Monday, October 4, 2010

That's why they call them CRUSHES!

Written by Lindsay K. of Love Kudos

In the movie Sixteen Candles, Samantha, a sophomore in high school has a huge crush on the 1980's version of McDreamy, who happens to be a senior.  During a late night talk with her father, he offers her some wise words of advice. "That's why they call them crushes.  If they were easy, they'd call them something else. "

For everyone who has ever experienced an unrequited crush, one understands the anguish and mental torment that accompanies it. When we were younger, it felt more like your heart was broken in a million pieces and you would never recover. Now that we are older, it feels more like a bruised ego and we can move on.

 During my junior year in high school, I had this huge crush on this guy in my trig class.   He was a rebel with spiky hair and was dumb as a box of rocks.  I can't remember his name, maybe it was John.  That year, I looked forward to going to that class (I wonder why? haha). I started to enjoy math and realized that I was actually adept at it.  John* and I talked during class and I helped him with his homework.  No romantic relationship transpired, but I think he knew I liked him.   Maybe he needed to see my answer to my "sex quiz".

As the movie continues, Samantha answers the questions to the "anonymous" sex quiz; memorializing she's a virgin and she would like to do it with Jake.  She drops the completed quiz on the floor for her friend, Randy, behind her.  Jake watches Sam drop the quiz and sneakily reaches his foot to obtain the quiz before the sleeping friend wakes up.  After class she asks her friend Randy if she got the quiz, but learns she never saw it. Samantha responds, "God, I hope whoever got that note doesn't know it was me who wrote it. I'd shit twice and die."

  How would the movie end if Jake never learned that our dear Sam had a crush on him?  

Unfortunately crushes don't end in high school, but continue on to adulthood. Luckily the way we go about starting a romance has improved.  Now we can send them an email, or wink without having to be face to face.  I think Facebook offers a great way to let someone know you have a little crush on them. Case in point, I was looking through my friend's friendlist and came upon a cutie.  I coordinated a place where we would be at the same place as this guy, so I could introduce myself.  
Later, I "friended" him on FB and left a personal message, "It was nice meeting you the other day.  Want to do it again?"  It was a bold move on my end, but I figured I had to put myself out there and let him know I was interested.  If it didn't work, then he could just ignore the comment and I would never see him again.  This time it worked and he asked me out on a date. 

When I asked a guy friend how they would let someone know they were interest, he responded, "I don't know, depends on how bad I liked them. I guess I would probably try to ask them out if I could muster up the balls."   Love Kudos recommends you muster up the balls and take some action. 

Lauren K. recommends taking calculated risks in the love arena. If you think you are a 5 and the guy or girl you want to go out with is a 9.5, perhaps he or she may be out of your league. If you can handle the possible rejection, then go for it. I can admit that Bradley Cooper is out of my league, but I am willing to take the chance of rejection for a kiss from my Hollywood idol. I am just not going to stalk him in LA to see if that happens. The odds are not exactly in my favor. Lauren continues, "I was watching the show Parenthood tonight and in one of the storylines, a young, hip mom encourages her nerdy 16 year old son to make a move on his hottie lab partner and it turns into utter disaster. He misreads the social cues, mistaking her interest in his book smarts for being into him. I am sure that science class the next day will be awkward." Sixteen Candles is in fact one of my favorite movies, as well as all of the 80's John Hughes' flicks.

Lindsay wants to encourage you to take some action with your love life. What's the worst that could happen?  What's the best thing that could happen?  In dating, it is a numbers game and the more you do something the more comfortable you get at it.  Make it happen!"  

Do you need help on how to tell your crush? 

Love Kudos is here to listen.  
Email us your situation:



Flirt Body Language said...

Whatever you do, don't interrupt unless it's to ask questions or ask him to explain further. If you want to know how to impress a guy in conversations, then learn to wait for your turn. Even if you have a great story to tell, keep it for now. You'll get your chance later.

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